In the morning, pick up the phone. Check. Anyone love me on Facebook? Twitter?
Twitter. So many smarter people - articles lead places I can't follow. Or silliness. High level of.
Pick earrings - what matches best? What makes me look best?
Check the mirror. More make up needed, but no time. No skill. Skills no match for face.
Work. Check email. Do work. Beat my head against the wall of things I don't know. Or manipulate the lesser things with ease. Greater than and smaller than both.
Lunch. Alone, things to do, to learn. Work at my skills. Fail. Fail at people. Am I lonely? Or with people, and fail to get out, or fail to learn new things.
Check the phone again. Am I clever enough to say something to the universe?
Not clever enough. Did I eat too much? Am I putting on weight again? Check a reflective surface. Not too bad.
Mostly not clever enough. Something beeps. Attend, and forget self for a few moments. Immersed, free.
Surface on the drive home. Talk. Compare. Do I talk too much? Fail at conversation, I do talk too much. Home. The mirror again. Still disappointing. Why would anyone?
Dinner. Smiles in public, keen awareness of self. Eat. Forget for a little. Talk about adventure. Smile some more. Get smiles in return.